How To Feel Fulfilled In Life


You have qualities and characteristics that are unique to you.

When you know who you are, you are inspired to act from that place which creates super powerful results.


Bring to mind something you do that you absolutely love doing.

When you do this thing, time stops and you are fully present.

Ask yourself, “What fascinates me or lights me up?”

This is very different than what am I good at.

It could be being in nature, cooking, playing a sport, traveling, dancing, gardening, being with your family or an animal.

What is important is NOT the activity, but rather the qualities that come out in you while you are doing it.

For example, I love coaching people.

When I doing it, I am compassionate, inspired, giving, fully present, intuitive, nurturing, playful and loving.

Those are my superpowers, the qualities that make me uniquely who I am.

When I tap into those qualities, I can create powerful results.

It is not my overachieving or care-taking coping strategies that are driving me to produce those results.

It is my qualities that inspire me to create experiences that are fulfilling.


What are several things you love doing or experiences you’ve had that you’ve thoroughly enjoyed?

  • List all the qualities that emerge when you are engaged in something you love.
  • Look for qualities that occur over multiple experiences.
  • Choose 5 to 10 of the most consistent qualities and name them your superpower.


Superpower -> Inspiration -> Result -> Fulfillment

Use your superpowers to give yourself the very thing you were using the coping strategy to get.

For instance…

If it is approval seeking and validations you were looking for, give yourself those things by stepping into your qualities of self compassion and acceptance.

If you long to be taken care of, boost your level of self care by being nurturing and loving to yourself.

If you tried to make others happy, make yourself happy by embracing joy.

When you give yourself internally the experience you were looking for externally, you will have nothing to compensate for.


Being inspired is much different than being driven or even motivated.

Before you make a choice or take an action, investigate whether you are being driven by your coping strategies or inspired by your superpowers.


You may now be inspired to take action, but I want to warn you of the trap you may fall into..

A lot of people send time talking about what they want, but they invest a lot MORE time and energy avoiding what they don’t want.

You either are motivated by going towards something or motivated by moving away from what you don’t want.

The more painful your past experiences the stronger your desire to avoid feeling like that ever again.

This is the avoidance trap.

For example, I had a client who moved a lot as a kid, so he felt very insecure.

He was never in a home long enough to feel secure and felt self conscious every time he had to go to a new school.

So as an adult he did everything to avoid feeling insecure – he kept the same job, stayed in the same house and married someone he knew would not reject him.

He felt secure, but was not living up to his potential.

His superpower was creativity and he dreamed of being an artist, but his fear of insecurity kept him stuck.

Other avoidance traps are the fear of abandonment, intimacy, vulnerability, being out of control, being judged or disappointing others.

We try to keep ourselves safe and avoid pain, but it is a trap.


What is your avoidance trap?

Ask yourself…

What feeling or situation do you not want to experience?

What will you do almost anything to avoid?

What are you missing out on when you avoid doing the things you fear?

What does it prevent you from doing?

How is it limiting you?

What is the cost of your trap?

Is it preventing you from taking risks, doing what you truly want, being vulnerable, engaging in intimate relationships or going for your dreams?

What is the benefit or payoff of avoidance?

Is it greater than the cost of not doing what you want?

Is avoiding disappointing someone more important than speaking your truth?

Is avoiding uncertainty worth not pursuing your dreams?

What baby step can you take?

What action step can you take toward what you want?

Choose something you have not done in the past, because you were too busy avoiding something.


Have you figured out what you are committing to and when you will start moving towards it…

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