Do You Worry About Other People’s Opinions Of You?
Have you ever tried to mold yourself into something you are not just to influence what other people think about you?
You may have worried…
“What will people think if I try or do that?”
“How will they think I look? Will they like what I’m wearing?”
What did I sound like, when I said that? Did I say it right?”
Influencing Whether People Like Us Or Not
You may think you can control whether people will like you or not – if they will think you’re hip or good looking or smart or successful.
Many of you spend a lot of time pretending, putting on airs or even lying to people, because you want them to have a certain opinion of you.
The harsh reality is that even if you do ALL that, you still can’t control their opinion of you.
All You Can Control Is Your Own Thoughts
When you try to turn yourself into somebody you are not or do something to control someone else’s opinion, you are only controlling your thoughts about their opinion.
You never really know what someone is thinking. They may tell you you’re amazing, but you will never know for sure.
The truth it’s none of your business, because what other people think is based on their history, their biases and their values.
The Life Of The Party
Imagine you show up at a small party with 8 other guests.
Since it is a small party, everyone will hear you tell the same stories and the same funny jokes. They also will all see what you are wearing.
Now if their opinion of you was based on what you said and did, then all 8 people would have the exact same opinion of you.
You look the same. You act the same to every single person.
But they won’t, will they?
They will all have different opinions of you, because their opinion of you is based on them.
Nothing You Can Do About That…
You may look like their high school coach, so they may love/hate you the minute you walk in the door.
You could remind them of an ex-lover or friend. Nothing you can do about that.
They may hate what you are wearing, because you look too good or it’s not their style. Nothing you can do about that.
They may like you, because they think you are like them or because you are different.
We don’t really know why people like us or don’t, because we never know what’s going on in their mind, their history or their preferences.
A Fake Version Of Yourself
When you try to act or be a certain way, so someone will like you, you don’t show up as yourself.
You show up as some fake version of yourself that’s trying to please other people.
We think teenagers are the only ones that do this, but the truth is we are all guilty of it, right?
We want to show up as interesting, engaging, successful, happy…
I’m The Juiciest Orange
You could be juiciest orange in the world, but there will always be someone that doesn’t like oranges.
It’s never the orange’s fault, right? It’s just one person’s preference for oranges or not.
Understanding this can change your life!
They Love The False You
If you show up as a version of yourself, that you think someone will like, they may love that version of you – but that isn’t really you.
So they won’t ever know the real you!
What if…
You decided to just start showing up, telling the truth and being who you truly are?
You stopped trying to hide the parts of you that you think they won’t like and stopped pretending to be someone you aren’t?
You no longer had anxiety about how you should act or look?
You believed this is how I am meant to be and if you don’t like it – no harm done – I’m not for everybody!
I’d love to help you find that true peace of mind and confidence!
Click here to read Other People’s Opinions Don’t Matter, the next post in this series.
Love to hear how you decided to stop fitting in and be your true self! Please share in the comments below…
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