How Do I Get Rid Of Fear?

When was the last time you laid in bed staring at the ceiling feeling physically sick with anxiety and stress?

To me it feels like a black, dense mass that fills my stomach, my chest, and my throat with tension.

I also get hot and sweaty – it isn’t pretty.

It comes when I am critical of myself or someone else for something that was done.

I can lay there for hours replaying the event over and over in my mind.

The thoughts just keep looping in my mind and at times it feels impossible to stop them.

It is awful!

What Is Stress?

Stress, fear and anxiety are all pretty much the same thing.

They come from a feeling that we’re not in control, which causes our sympathetic nervous system to create a fight, flight or freeze reaction.

To get myself back to sanity, I remind myself that Fear is only sensations in my body caused by my thoughts. 

They are just chemicals.

The threat is not real.

Useful Reason To Feel Fear

The only useful reason to feel fear is when we are confronted with physical danger like being chased by a bear.

Your thoughts, on the other hand, that cause those feelings of Fear cannot hurt you.

The single worst way to try to deal with fear is to fight it.

We do this by distracting ourselves by eating, drinking, taking drugs, etc.

Looping Thoughts

The other destructive tendency is to feed it by replaying the event over and over in your mind.

Fear has a huge appetite – it will eat everything you throw its way.

When I am in fear mode, I remind myself Fear has a valuable purpose.

The only way to discover Fear’s purpose is to be willing to feel it, observe it and be curious about it, instead of fighting it.

Once you figure out the message “thank it” for its concern.

Reminded it you have always dealt with every single issue life has thrown at you and have come out more than fine.

“I’ll be OK no matter what! I’ve got this.”

Doing this every time the fear feeling comes up will start to relax you considerably and create new neural pathways of confidence and calm.

You Got This!

There is nothing in your life you haven’t coped with and there is nothing you won’t be able to cope with this side of death.

Sure there will be times when it doesn’t feel like that, when the Fear Monster is whispering in your ear that things won’t be OK.

But it’s NOT TRUE and the only power the fear monster has over you is the power you give him.

Just hug him (or her) and say, “thanks” for your thoughts and we are going to be more than OK.

In the next blog post in this stress tips series, I will give you other tools you can use to grab back your power and shut down that voice of Fear.